five-finger magic

slash90I’m a fan of the guitar. Or, to be more exact, the guitar solo. Or, as Jack Black passionately calls it in School of Rock, the “face-melter.”

A face-melter is Tommy Skeoch’s addictive intro in Tesla’s “Edison’s Medicine.” It is C.C. DeVille’s devilish aural masturbation in Poison’s “Life Goes On.” It is Neal Schon’s wicked wankering in Hardline’s “Takin’ Me Down.”

Aside from melodies and heart-wrenching ballads, the reason why I like glam metal, arguably the most maligned sub-genre of heavy metal, is its sweeping solos. This never fails to make me stop whatever it is I’m doing, and just sit and listen and be carried away. (Having said that, the reason why I hate the so-called nu-metal – and probably other rock genres that sprouted after 2000 – is it considers solos as an obsolete art form.)

The appreciation goes a long way. I spent my teen years admiring the fingers of Zakk Wylde, Kirk Hammet and Jimmy Page as they spider-danced over the fretboard, creating auditory wonders in the process. I thought, That’s one talent I want to have.

The moment I saw Slash playing his solo on top of Axl Rose’s piano toward the end of the “November Rain” video was the moment I knew I’d be having a lifelong affair with Les Paul’s sonic darling. I figured a killer performance like that would be my shortcut to any girl’s bedroom (and, more important, fantasy). After all, as Charmaine always says, what can be sexier than a  man with a guitar?

So I bought a cheap Fernando electric guitar in high school and practiced. And practiced. And practiced some more. I practiced and practiced until work and family and bimbos who didn’t give a fuck if I play the guitar or the fucking ukulele started getting in the way. Still, I practiced some more.

Years – and callouses – later, I’m still not half as good as Slash. But at least I got his smoking habit. There’s weird comfort in that.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. charmk
    Oct 08, 2009 @ 10:55:25

    Someday you’ll be a great guitarist, just keep on practicing! I’ll practice with you, drums naman ang sa akin. Let’s form a band! What d’ya think? Hehehe! 🙂

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